Happiness
by Dick Sutphen
Happiness is an interesting trap.
"FLOW" author Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi says, "More than anything else, people seek happiness." He then adds, "Happiness is sought for its own sake, but all our other goals -- health, beauty, money or power -- are valued because we expect they will make us happy."
In "The Path to Love," Deepak Chopra says, "... happiness too often means a 'pleasure response.' But this means there must be a stimulus attached to it. "There can be no sense of security in your existence when it depends upon outside factors, for the unpredictable changes of reality can never be controlled."
So to be happy, we need to find a source of happiness beyond pleasure. Yet biochemists have proven that pleasure can release serotonin and beta-endorphins -- brain mind opiates that are chemically almost identical to opium. The more you release the happier you feel. And the opiates are addictive.
So is a pleasure stimulus to the brain the same as happiness? It feels that way. But the problem is a stimulus wears out. Deepak says, "Over time our responses weaken if the same stimulus keeps getting repeated. The taste that was once so sweet grows stale and cloying; the face that once enchanted becomes ordinary; the most exciting vision becomes just part of the scenery.
"It is all important to found our happiness upon a basis that doesn't change."
In his book, "Actualizations," Stewart Emery says, "We have the implicit belief in goals the same way we have the implicit belief in Santa Claus. It is the continuing saga of our addiction to form. We still firmly believe that something outside of ourselves is going to make us happy."
"If I get a million dollars, I'll be happy."
"If I get a new car, then I'll be happy."
"If I get a new job, then I'll be happy."
"If I get straight A's in school, then I'll be happy."
"If I get my Ph.D., then I'll be happy."
"If only __________, then I'll be happy." You fill in the blank.
"Goals have become part of that whole happiness-through-acquisition belief program that everybody has bought. It works this way: For most of us, life floats between terrible and bearable, but there is hope -- hope that life will be more bearable if we achieve a goal exterior to ourselves. As if the destination itself will have any effect upon the traveler.
"The fact is that goals do not deliver what we are asking and expecting them to deliver. That has become a source of disillusionment and dissatisfaction in our society. Every time we reach a goal, we have momentary feeling of elation (temporary well-being) followed by a sinking realization with what we said we wanted, but without the experience that getting what we said we wanted was going to bring us. Ripped off again."
It seems to me that happiness has to come from within as a result of what we do in life. If you go to www.dicksutphen.com and click on the "Books, Excerpts and Columns" button (fourth from the bottom) you will have an opportunity to choose "How To Fix Everything In Your Life At Once." The chapters are actually the scripts from my old "25 Best Ways" CD series. Chapter 15 is "Create Happiness."
Almost all 25 suggestions need to be manifested from within. My favorite happiness suggestion is "Develop Detached Mind," followed by "Accept that what is, is," "Live in the present," and "Choose a positive viewpoint."
© 2008 Dick Sutphen. All Rights Reserved. Republished by Sunset Spiritualist Church with consent of the author.